If you have been asked to deliver a eulogy, you may feel overwhelmed and nervous about saying the right thing. When you deliver a eulogy, you are not only saying a last farewell to a dearly departed friend, but you are also speaking for many people at the funeral. While you are planning your eulogy, keep the following tips in mind to craft a speech that reflects the beliefs of the departed and honors their life.
Understand Why They Asked You to Give a Eulogy
Ideally, the deceased will state who they would like to give their eulogy in their will or funeral plans. If this is the case, they may have already discussed with you why they have selected you to deliver the eulogy. It may be because they feel you knew them best, or perhaps they believe that you can offer the most comfort to their loved ones.
If you have been selected by the loved ones of the deceased, it is important to know why they selected you. If you do not feel like you are able to deliver a eulogy, it is okay to decline and allow the honor to pass to someone else.
Understanding why you are the one giving the eulogy will help you craft an appropriate speech. You should keep in mind that you were asked for a specific reason, so you should try to be yourself as much as possible. Be honest and vulnerable while writing and delivering the eulogy.
Keep Private Matters Private
Many people lead complicated lives, and the people who know them may only know certain aspects of their life. If the deceased was involved in an alternative lifestyle that they were not open about with all of their friends and family, a funeral is not the place to discuss that aspect of their life. You may want to hold a separate memorial with just friends from that part of their life if you feel the need.
The only exception to this is if the deceased asked you, before their death, to explain private matters of their life to those they have left behind.
Ask for Input from Loved Ones
While a eulogy is very personal, you should remember that the deceased had complex relationships with many people. Getting input from other loved ones will help you create a eulogy that acknowledges the deceased as a whole person. The way they tell their stories will also help you set the tone for the eulogy.
Writing a reflective, honest eulogy can be one of the most difficult tasks when it comes to funeral planning. Following these rules should help you create a eulogy that gives honor and respect to the deceased.
If you have questions regarding your eulogy, a funeral planner, like those at Lawry Brothers Funeral Home, is often a great resource.